I feel like I’m losing my faith.

I don’t know how to communicate my feelings effectively since I’m struggling to even understand myself right now, but I’ll try.

I’m 14 years old and I’ve been a Christian my whole life. I’m into a lot of theology and philosophy and I’d say I have a thorough understanding of Christianity and other religions.

Going to church is not for me. Attending religious practices is not for me. But my parents force me to.

I feel like this religious obligation and this pressure to adhere to my parents’ requests are making me feel like faith is an obligation. I feel like theres something wrong with me because I believe attending religious practices or events don’t foster my relationship with God. I understand that faith should be personal, and my alone time with God out of my free will really aided me in developing my relationship with Him.

I’m just lost. I don’t know what to do. I’m sorry if this post isn’t clear. Thank you for reading this.